She was one of those girls, drawn towards the movies because of her mixed up messed up past, all broken promises and visions of places that may or may not have existed.
Something went wrong, back then, and she never got a chance to grow in to who she was, who she wanted to be.
Acting was a chance to be someone else. To be someone else so deeply that maybe underneath it, she'd find out who she really was. There was never anyone around to tell her who to be or where to go. A childhood of guessing and hoping and seeing people wave goodbye, never to return.
Every audition, every rejection, was just like those younger times on foggy country roads that smelled of morning rain, where people waved goodbye from old cars getting ever closer to the distance.
She wanted one role. One chance to stake her claim. To show people her sinking eyes. To prove once and all that she existed. She assumed that, if she could be a movie star, she'd be so famous that someone would be able to explain who she was, and where she was meant to go.
Still she waited, ever hopeful. Everyone thought she wanted fame, but she just wanted to be accepted.
interesting... waiting to see how this develops ;)
ReplyDelete