The Old Negro Space Program

I found this completely by accident today - and thought it was hilarious! It's 'The Old Negro Space Program' - the story of the 'Blackstronauts' and their forgotten accomplishments. Very funny!!

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Polarity Of Pretentiousness - Talking With People In The Film Industry.

What's meant to happen is that the Filmy Person says "Have you seen [amazing old French movie] and you reply with "Um, ehhh, I'm not sure-- I think, maybe.." and then that person feels temporarily wonderful that they love more films than you, whereas you feel inadequate, pathetic, and useless. However, with me, I always forget to play the victim and instead the conversation is a bit bizarre.

FILMY PERSON
Have you seen 'Où Se Trouvent
Le Jambon Et La Yaourt?'

KID
No.

FILMY PERSON
Really? You must have! It's
directed By Jean-Luke La Mer.

KID
Is it the one with the Jamaicans
and the bobsleigh?

FILMY PERSON
Um, no - it's the one shot in
1934 in France, it stars Mary
Une Trousse. How can you not
have seen it?

KID
I've never been able to
see films before I've watched them.

FILMY PERSON
You call yourself a film director
but you haven't seen it?. TELL ME
you've seen 'Une Bouteille D'eau Du Pain?"

KID
No.

FILMY PERSON
Then how can you call yourself a
film director, when you're watching
films about Jamaicans who bobsleigh?

KID
Because I watched the film about
Jamaicans who bobsleigh and I still
managed to direct a film.

FILMY PERSON
Yeah but how can you call
yourself a director?

KID
Because I directed a film.

FILMY PERSON
Yeah but you've never seen 'Où Se
Trouvent Le Jambon Et La Yaourt'

KID
You've never seen the one about
the Jamaicans and the bobsleigh.

FILMY PERSON
Why would I want to?

KID
I don't know, I thought we were
naming films we haven't seen.

FILMY PERSON
No I'm saying you can't call
yourself a director if you haven't
seen 'Où Se Trouvent 'Le Jambon
Et La Yaourt'

KID
But I didn't direct that one.

FILMY PERSON
I'm saying, look-- I-I I'm saying
that you can't call yourself a
director if you haven't seen 'Où Se
Trouvent Le Jambon Et La Yaourt.'

KID
But I directed a film, in fact many films,
and I've never seen that film.

The Filmy Person begins shaking, and looking completely lost. He has no idea how to feel good about himself, he's only able to do it when putting others down.

It's like that famous quote, 'No one can make you feel inferior without your consent' - by Eleanor Roosevelt. It really takes two to tango with these conversations. Being CONFIDENT with the fact that you think GHOST or JERSEY GIRL are the greatest films ever is far more impressive and amazing to me than someone who oppresses others through judgement and pretentiousness. I have more to write on this topic, and will, tomorrow. But right now I need to go and watch WILD WILD WEST and SHE'S ALL THAT.

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One More Night At The Movies.

Michael Field tells us about working in a movie theater and how it changes your movie-going experience, and then gets more specific with memories from being in New York. You can read his story over on Out Of Left Field

And lastly, here is something a little bit special. Symphonic Discord is a wonderful blog, co-authored by various Muslim Girls who offer their interesting perspectives on the world. As their blog title explains, "These are the voices of different Muslim girls. We disagree, we argue, and each of us is unique with different opinions. In the hopes of teaching you something and making the world a little bit more open minded, we present to you our Symphonic Discord."

Anyways, the girls got together to collectively write about the stories of One Night At The Movies Long Ago. Read their great stories HERE.

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A Collaborative Blogging Project - One Night At The Movies Long Ago

This has been an amazing experience. Please find some spare time over the next day or two to work your way through these posts.

We begin with Nurse Julianne's beautiful story of seeing 'Titanic' with her family. And I have a feeling, after you all read her story, she'll be having a lot more than two blog followers.

"Coincidently my life hit an iceberg at soon after this night at the movies. Metaphorically, the catastrophe played out in the final scenes of the ships sinking was adjacent to my own life over them next few years. Bill and Dad died. Mum has severe dementia. Matt and I are no longer together.

But that night at the movies with my family taught me to grab life, hold it tight, cherish it, and hold on to the bitter end. To keep on playing like the band, to hold out my hands like the priest, giving all i have to offer. To carry on making every day count even when loved ones pass away."
-Nurse Julianne



But if you're looking for the most memorable of movie going experiences. A first kiss story would be pretty hard to beat.

"I wonder just how many films go "unwatched" in theatres all over the world because of first dates?"
-Michelle Goode over at Solfluid

Around the time of your first kiss, you were probably also sneaking into movies you weren't allowed to see. Oliver J. Hunt remembers it vividly.

"What if they look at my boyish charm and rat me out? Do I run? Or keep my dignity as I stroll out without a care (even if I HAD to see this film)?"
New Film Blog.

Enough of this polite, charming stuff. We can rely on Alyson to take us on a different journey.

"The ride back was all cigarettes, rap music, and complaints again. When we pulled in my driveway he parked and looked at me expectantly. I’m not sure what he was expecting exactly...a blow job, a thank you, high praise for his cocksmanship. But what he got was:

“You ruined the movie!"
-Other Worldly One

To wrap things up - a few of the bloggers were unsure of what to write, or struggling for memories - but managed to write fascinating articles anyway. Vanessa Weinart, of TheMovieNess shares the buzz of being at the Cannes Film Festival, "It is a very strange feeling standing in a sort of cage next to the red carpet while Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt and George Clooney walk past you, followed by a herd of extremely well dressed photographers"

CrazyCris is literally Here And There Any Everywhere with his post, with two many memories to choose from. "Halfway through the movie I realised my brain was automatically replaying all the original dialogue in my head and I wasn't really hearing the dubbed dialogue at all! Nope I was hearing the real voices of Luke, Leia and Han!"

Similarly, Greg at Cinema Styles have plenty of different memories - "Or spending most of Top Gun smoking in the lobby (you could do that back then) and then returning to my seat to have my friend Jake lean over and start to explain what happened while I was out only to be abruptly cut off by me announcing, "I don't care.""

And finally, Kate Gabrielle over at Silents And Talkies admits that she's more of a DVD girl, "I've always been underwhelmed with the theater-going experience, but maybe that's just because I don't usually go with anyone who is as excited about the films as I am. Or maybe it's because I am more self conscious about crying or laughing aloud than I am in my own home, watching the films on television."

I think that's everyone. If anyone is moved to continue on this theme, please email me a link to your blog and I'll get the word out here. Also, in case you missed it, here is my original - about Henrietta choosing trainers over 'The Apartment.'

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One Night At The Movies Long Ago

Today, on December 3rd, many of my favourite bloggers will be writing on the same topic as me, 'One Night At The Movies Long Ago.' My vision is that we all share a memory from a memorable time we had at the movies, from some time in our past. Below is my story - and tomorrow, I will share links to all the others, so be sure to pop back.

Note For Americans: In the UK we don't say 'sneakers' we say 'trainers'.

One Night At The Movies Long Ago

It was my birthday, and I was meant to go for a meal with the family. But The Apartment was screening in London, and my family didn't want to go see The Apartment in London. Maybe they did, but I didn't. I mean, I didn't want to go with them. It's not that I didn't love them it's just that I didn't want to go and see The Apartment with them so I rearranged my birthday for another night. I didn't rearrange my whole birthday, just the part where the family sits in a restaurant and eats together. To change my whole birthday would take a lot of forms and I'd probably need a lawyer. At the very least, I'd need a brand new birth certificate, which is much harder to find as you get older.

So I moved my family back a day, or forward a day, I can't remember which -- and I decided for my birthday to go and see The Apartment. I didn't want to go alone, I wanted to go with Henrietta. Just because her name was beautiful and she was too. For that reason, I knew she wouldn't come. But I asked her, anyway, because there's nothing better than being rejected on your birthday. I decided to play it cool and ask in a really smooth way, not in the way I normally would - you know, in which I get all weird about my love for black and white movies, thinking girls will think I'm a nerd with no life. So I said to her, "I don't want you to think I'm a nerd with no life or anything, and I don't want you to think I like you, or anything, but I'm wondering, do you want to come and see an old movie with me tonight? Um, you don't have to, but you can do, if-- like, I don't know. Um, so- yeah. An old movie. Me and you. On my birthday."

She looked at me like I was a nerd with no life. I expected a verbal response but she just held the look.
"Do you think I'm a nerd with no life?" I asked her. She said, "You want to go and see an old movie on your birthday?"
And I said "Yes."
And she said, "okay."
And I said "Okay, you think I'm a nerd?"
And she said "I think you're a nerd and I will come and see the movie."
And I said "That's great, but can we stop putting 'And I said' at the beginning because it's getting repetitive now?"
And she said, "It's not us that's doing that, it's a blogger a few years from now."
And I said, "Let's go see the movie."

So we went to see the movie. But not straight away, because I asked her three days before the screening was due to start and I doubt they'd have just played it when we got there.

I should explain to you that 'The Apartment' is my second favourite film. In fact, it's possibly my first, depending on my mood. In this mood, it's my second favourite, in my other mood, it's my favourite. That's the best I can explain it. The crazy thing is that I'd never seen it on the big screen before. I was desperate to! It's my second favourite, sometimes first favourite film-- so I had to see it on the big screen.

It suddenly dawned on me that life was awesome. I was about to have a birthday, and I was about the see The Apartment on the big screen and this beautiful, wonderful girl, Henrietta, was coming with me, despite her thinking I was a nerd with no life.

The day finally arrived and with a burst of energy I jumped out of bed. It was still about twelve hours until the screening so immediately after the burst of energy and jump out of bed I simply made a cup of tea and switched on the TV. Eventually, the evening came-- my second favourite film, FINALLY, on the big screen - with a girl who I liked more than I had liked anyone in weeks. Perfection.

It was time to meet - I don't remember what time it was but I remember Henrietta getting things slightly wrong and being slightly late. Anyways, we jumped on a train a bit like how I jumped out of bed earlier except we didn't make a cup of tea and switch on the TV after. We were on our way to the cinema to see THE APARTMENT on the BIG SCREEN. What could be better than that?

I was feeling pretty confident by that point. I remember thinking, "Hey, maybe beautiful girls do like old movies."
And she said, "Are you talking to me?"
I decided to play it cool, to be like one of those super confident guys who knows exactly what to say to women.
I said, "Um, so like - do---do you think I'm a bit of a nerd with no life for going to see an old film on my birthday?"
She said, "I think you're a nerd for going to see an old movie but it make no difference if you go on your birthday."
I thought she was being playful and enjoying my self-deprecating, self-hating nature.

So we got to London. I suddenly realised that time was flying by. I looked at my watch, obviously. I mean, how else would I have realised time was flying by. The film was due to start in fifteen minutes time and it was at least a ten minute walk, eleven with the shoes she was wearing. But I had comfy trainers so I set us the task of making it in nine.

"I just want to buy some shoes," she said.
"What?" I said.
"White things. Leather. Laces."
"I want to go see the film." I responded.
"But I want to get some trainers quickly, there's a Fred Perry shop over there."
"But I want to see the film."
"I'll be quick." She said.

I tried my best to say No, we MUST see this film, but she was really pretty and there was no way she'd listen to anything I had to say. So I said.. actually, I didn't say anything, I just had this sunken look. So she went to buy her shoes and I went to sulk next a guy who was playing Cat Stevens songs on his guitar. Well, I assume it was his guitar. It's not the sort of thing you bring up in the middle of 'Sad Lisa.'

Henrietta reappeared like seven minutes later and I was livid. Well, not really livid, because I was young and she was pretty, so I couldn't really show my disdain. So instead, she said, "you okay?" and I just nodded and felt sunken.

So we ran to the cinema. Well that was the plan but she wasn't wearing her new trainers because she didn't want to get them dirty, so I kind of walked with reasonably fast-pacing whilst she scuttled along in her shoes that added an extra two minutes to our journey.

Finally, WE ARRIVED! But the film had started twelve minutes ago. Henrietta said something about how the trailers would be showing now. I said there wouldn't be trailers because it's an old film and she said maybe we should go see something else. I stood there feeling sunken whilst she stood there feeling happy that she'd bought new shoes. We walked up to the box office just to check if the film had, luckily, not started.

We did, luckily, get to the box office when there was no line or anything. But then, unluckily, we were informed that yes, the film had started. Fourteen minutes of my second favourite movie had gone by.

"Let's go in." said Henrietta. I looked at her, and she looked a little different. Not quite as beautiful as she did before.

We went back to Covent Garden. We drank some tea. We chatted, we laughed, the night was not all lost. But I couldn't help but feel a little sunken. It was my birthday, and I never got to see The Apartment.


Come back tomorrow to find many more 'One Night At The Movies Long Ago' stories from some of the best writers on the internet. If you are a blogger and want to write on this same theme, please email me your blog address and details -- and I'll feature your story tomorrow.

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