Somewhere Over The Rainbow

I want to find an island somewhere, where the creative people can go. Where dreaming is a way of life and a writer can spend three years, if inclined, just to find the perfect word.

It's a place where no-one is interrupted. Where the lingering creative idea gets to be fully dreamed up and held onto, without being stopped by the phone ringing, or person shouting or appliance breaking.

There are no egos in this land. Nobody is marketing themselves or selling their work, they're just creating. They're turning up and working. Some people hide in the mountains for days, others pace up and down in the sand, looking for a clue that will lead to the perfect sentence or insight or twist.

And the work is enough. They can have the red carpets and press conferences back on the mainland, but here everyone is too busy working on something new.

And if you think you need a five mile walk in order to think of an idea, you can do it. If you need to sit in a group and meditate for five days in order to truly get into the head of your character, you can. No-one will judge you here, because everyone knows you're working. Working on what's really important. The dreaming life. The fantasies. The problems in your head that trouble you. On the mainland they deal with them by medicating, and sleeping with the secretary, here on the island we delve deeply into who we are as humans, and we take as long as we need to figure out whatever it is we need in order to tell our stories.

And everyone is there for you, and everyone is listening. Because they're all dreamers and writers and rock stars. And life will take on new meaning because we took the time to get down to what it's really all about.

I want to find an island somewhere.

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What I Learned From The Blogger Meltdown

1. The owner of the blog doesn't have any power. Google could shut down Blogger tomorrow if it wanted to -- and all of my content would be gone, all of you would be gone. It's the same with Facebook, and Twitter. Even our emails. We have no power. It can all be swept away, or changed.

2. There was a MAJOR security issue regarding my blog during the down time. I tried contacting Blogger about it, but can't get to a human, can't get a response. So I'm left just feeling vulnerable about it. This is how Sony Playstation 3 users feel now. These companies provide services and we come to expect something from them. But who's to say they need to be ethical? Who says they're here for us?

3. Facebook, Blogger, etc, they own us, more than we realize. They give us the privilege of their often fantastic, revolutionary services, and we come to rely on them, they become a part of our lives. But you don't own the house, you're not even renting. You're just a squatter. You have no rights.

4. This quote from 'The Social Network' is so relevant. "Okay, let me tell you the difference between Facebook and everyone else, we don't crash EVER! If those servers are down for even a day, our entire reputation is irreversibly destroyed! Users are fickle, Friendster has proved that. Even a few people leaving would reverberate through the entire userbase. The users are interconnected, that is the whole point. College kids are online because their friends are online, and if one domino goes, the other domino's go, don't you get that?"

5. This isn't just an issue of maintenance and technical issues. A lot of blogs serve very important functions in the world and how it communicates (I'm not talking about my blog here.)

6. We don't know who 'Blogger' are, or who 'Google' are, or any of the services we use and get addicted to. A friend says 'download this app for your phone' or 'Get an Itunes account!" and we do it and if we like it, we stay. But you're not dealing with someone in your neighbourhood, you're dealing with big anonymous corporations. And Facebook is spying on Google, and Sony Playstation have accidentally put people's personal details in jeopardy, and Blogger suffered 'Data Corruption.'

7. I realise I sound like an idiot for caring so much about the fact a blogging website went down for two days.

8. But I am extremely pissed about point '2', and don't know what to do about it. The only people I want to speak to about it are Blogger themselves, but they're AWOL.

9. Have you ever thought about how powerless we are? I have some great friends all around the world, and the only way we stay in touch is through social networks, emails and blogs. They could get hacked, or the companies decide to close down immediately, or they could charge money, they could do anything they want; and where would we be? How would we stay in touch? We wouldn't even know where to find each other. There are no rules when it comes to this stuff. We have no idea what happens to our data.

10. I need to back up this website immediately, does anyone have any ideas how to do it?

11. If anyone has any experience switching blogging platforms and retaining all of/the majority of their readership, please give me advice.

12. Most of this I wouldn't care about. But point '2' was a disgrace. "A small subset of Blogger users (we estimate 0.16%) may have encountered additional problems specific to their accounts.", I guess that's me. If anyone here has direct email addresses for the people at Blogger, please let me know. 


Technorati Code 3R7J52S2J79A

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The Black Box

We were sitting on trains, walking through parks, and laying on beaches. It didn't matter where we were, we just couldn't get enough of it. Each of us obsessively eating into our data allowances as we messaged our friends and read news articles we forgot soon after.

We were in London, or Paris, or a mountain in some far away land. It didn't matter where we lived, because we lived in a box three inches from our faces that we kept glued to our hands.

And moments weren't between two people anymore. You write "I'm in a wonderful restaurant in Berlin with Sally". The world knows. Your school friend Bernard knows you're there. And @screenwriterharry22 has been informed.

You're not in a restaurant, you're in a little box of electrics. You tell a joke to your brother and its so funny that you instantly tell a version to Twitter and tag in Judd Apatow just in case he thinks you're hilarious. But the joke is no longer between you and your brother.

Because nothing is private anymore. Nothing is shared between two people. The world knows.

Never in history have we been so connected yet so isolated. We're closer to strangers across the world than people we're eating dinner with. Except we're hardly close at all. We're just people on opposite sides of the world staring at the little black boxes we keep glued to our hands. And old buildings are forgotten and old friends invited to a Facebook Fan Page. And we sit in a train or coffee house in London or Tokyo or somewhere else in the world, but nobody is there, because they're in their little black boxes doing critically important things. All except one thing: talking to the person on front of them.

Two people and a fireplace. That doesn't happen anymore. The flame is burning out, and I need a phone upgrade.

That was us in 2011.

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Texting Tom

Eight years ago I met Tom, when I was casting a film. I disliked him immediately but we ended up great friends.

At least I thought we did.

But then I realised I haven't seen him in three years.

Although we text nearly every day.

Our texts are completely nonsensical; and are comprised almost entirely, and randomly -- out of quotes from 'Forrest Gump', 'The Cable Guy', 'Groundhog Day' and 'You've Got Mail'. It's something like this.

KID

Do you think we should meet? 

TOM

You're a very nice guy, but I just don't have any room in my life for a new friend. Okay?  

KID

But I'm in the all America ping pong team.

TOM

Is there someone else? Oh! That woman on television, Sidney-Ann!!!

KID 

F-O-X

TOM 

Needlenose Ned?

KID

Ned the head? Ned Ryerson? Needlenose Ned? F-O-X? 

TOM 

It's the cable guy.

KID 

You like boats, but not the ocean.

TOM 

I never made a slam dunk before. Thanks for the boost. Racoons. 

KID 

Those must be comfortable shoes. You can sit here if you want to.

TOM

Jenny?

KID 

Momma, what's vacation?

TOM 

F-O-X

KID

Do you think we should meet? 

TOM

You're going down Red Knight! Down, down, down., Red Knight's goin' down. Down, down, down, Red Knight goin' down.

KID

You off to see the groundhog?

TOM

Nancy?

KID

That kid may be the stupidest son of a bitch I've ever seen, but he sure is fast! 

TOM 

Yes Drill Sargeant. 

I often find myself distracted from writing, or reaching for my phone during meetings, or even waking up in the middle of the night---- purely to add to our ongoing masterpiece of quotexts. I think it's because Lieutenant Dan was always getting these funny feelings about a rock or a trail or the road, so he'd tell us to get down, shut up. And what if there is no tomorrow? There wasn't one today.

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Keep Out

In a movie, it's much easier to be free. I came up with the name 'Kid In The Front Row' on a whim. But I think it expresses everything I feel about the cinema.

If I'm standing outside a fascinating old building with a 'Do Not Enter' sign, I don't want to obey it. I want to cross the line, I want to explore, and it's possible I will. But I'll feel guilty if I do, and I'll look over my back, convinced a security guy or policeman will make it a nightmare.

But when I write a screenplay, or film a scene, the characters can walk straight past that sign with ease.

'Do Not Enter' is everywhere. Don't enter that derelict building, don't enter into a relationship, don't enter into the film industry.

We go after the safe options. It's as if all of human experience has led us to a place of fear, where making a decision based on heart, or curiosity or hope is seen as absurd. Tell the person next to you that you want to go explore a haunted house, or you want to go explore Romania on your own, you'll meet resistance. People who know better. People who know the answers.

Movies are different. People stretch those boundaries, and they change. The best movies are about people who dare to risk, dare to love, dare to break out of the rules that society and the law placed down so pointlessly.

The other side of the no entry sign is where all the fun is. It's where life happens. For the most part, our fictional counterparts do it better than we do. And we get older, and less bolder, and satisfaction remains amiss.

Just a thought.

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