The Struggle

There are people with talent who spend every day perfecting their art. There are others who have huge talent but disregard it completely.

How do you become one or the other?

What makes one person value artistic integrity and the other take the money regardless of such matters?

Life is about happiness, right? What if you create crap junk films but are happy? Is that better or worse than being an indie artist who is struggling and poor?

That's what baffles people, when a woman quits her safe accounting job and becomes a waitress so that she can act. The odds are she'll fail.

Well she'll fail if she wants to get rich or be in big movies.

But maybe that's okay?

It's about if she's happy, right?

I value artistic vision, integrity, honesty. But what difference will it make when I'm 93 and peeing on the floor?

If you're creative and miserable, are you living the right life?

I say this because so many people in the industry are depressed and self-loathing and lacking in confidence. You get that in all walks of life, but in this industry, you're going against societal norms. Against the 9-5.

The rejection in film is horrid. As a director, my rejections are usually monetal. No-one wants to invest because it's too risky. They need names attached, clear plot points, clear genres. The other rejection comes as criticism. You spend two years making a movie and then some newspaper or internet guy writes about how you're talentless and not worthy of living.

For actors, it's constant rejection. Everyone knows actors get rejected but they don't know the toll it takes. An actor's job during a project is to bare their soul and in between projects their job is to protect it from crumbling.

The big thing is the uncertainty. When is the next pay cheque? When will they call back? When will I ever get a role?

Everyone is running around pitching ideas confidently in coffee houses and spreading their mediocre films on Facebook, but how are they feeling really?

Hardly anyone earns money at this. No-one knows how next month will pan out. And you might miss your best friend's wedding if you get the role in the movie.

This post is not about much of anything, but is just to say that I know a huge amount of people working extremely hard at this and nobody ever really sees it. I just want to give voice to the artists who are out there navigating through the complexities of living a creative life.

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A Few Thoughts On MY WEEK WITH MARILYN

"She was a star. Every time you saw her, she was something. Even when she was angry, it was just a remarkable person. A remarkable person, and in spades when she was on the screen."

-Billy Wilder

The Movie

I loved every second of this movie. It swept me away into its world and come the end, I didn't want it to stop.

Marylin died. She stopped dead. All we were left with was a tragic tale of one of the most beautiful people who ever lived. The film was like wish-fulfilment, it gave us time with her that we never thought we'd have again. Her life was so painful and she was so misunderstood, that its comforting to know that, in between all the madness, she had stolen moments of joy with people who cared about her.

I took a lot of myself into this movie. I guess that's why I enjoyed it more than many others who have reviewed it quite negatively. The film is about Colin Clark's first job in the movies, at Pinewood Studios, and I could relate. Your first time working at Pinewood is unforgettable. The big stages, the bland corridors, the movie stars. When you step into the studios you feel the history of cinema all around you. With 'My Week With Marilyn' we get to see it, too.

"She was just a continuous puzzle, without any solution"

-Billy Wilder

Michelle Williams

There aren't movie stars anymore. We have celebrities and gossip, but not everyone is grabbed. Monroe was something different. The saddest thing is that no-one quite knows what it was. It's impossible to put your finger on. Yet somehow, Michelle Williams was able to bring it alive again with her portrayal. I'm happy for the Academy to pack up the Oscar and post it to her now. She brought me closer to Marilyn Monroe than I ever expected to be. A truly phenomenal performance. 

Eddie Redmayne 

I don't even know this guy. He was good. But this film was all about Marilyn.

Judi Dench
She's a class act. 

Kenneth Branagh
I've never really been a fan, but he was perfect. Managed to be quietly and almost accidentally hilarious all the way through. We could feel his frustration. 


Emma Watson 
When the film finished, I talked to my friend Anna about Watson. I said that I think her career has peaked. Where can she go after Potter? What does she have left to say as an artist? You look at Michelle Williams and you could see she had something extra way back in the 'Dawson's Creek' days. Emma Watson is a decent actress and she's pretty, but do we care? Can she take us on a journey that doesn't involve wizards? I'm not sure.

Adrian Hodges (Writer) - Simon Curtis (Director)
They nailed it. Not only was the film about the magic of old movies, it felt like an old movie. Classic storytelling. The humor was small yet well played, the acting was spot on, the dialogue believable. It all added up to a very satisfying experience where we got transported back into the days of Marilyn Monroe. 

Cineworld Haymarket, London
We were in screen 1. There were only a handful of people. It's perfect. This cinema has history. It added to the experience. Everyone there loved the movie. How do I know? I just know. You can tell by the silence, by the laughs, by how people talk when the movie is over. 

"She was very tough to work with.  But what you had, by hook or crook, once you saw it on the screen, it was just amazing. Amazing, the radiation that came out. And she was, believe it or not, an excellent dialogue actress. She knew where the laugh was. She knew. But then again, we would have three hundred extras, Miss Monroe is called for nine o'clock, and she would appear at five in the afternoon. And she would stand there and say, 'I'm sorry, but I lost my way to the studio.' She had been under contract there for seven years!'

-Billy Wilder (Directed Marilyn in 'The Seven Year Itch' & 'Some Like It Hot')

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Tuesday Dialogue #5 - Jack Taylor, The Therapist & Maggie Taylor

Jack Taylor (George Clooney) is having a nightmare day. His job is in jeopardy, his career is on the line, and he's stuck with his daughter for the day. To make matters worse, he's met a woman, Melanie Parker (Michelle Pfeiffer), who is a "real piece of work".

There's only one way to make sense of it all. Go see your therapist. Things get a bit complicated due to his daughter being with him - hence Jack and the therapist are forced to talk in code. 

JACK

She, um, she just drops of the uh uh, bag of cookies and tells me to keep them for a week.

THERAPIST

How do you feel about the cookies Jack?

JACK

Love the cookies, have a big problem with the um, uh..

THERAPIST

Cookie maker?

JACK

That's right. 'Cause the cookie maker thinks that all I'm interested in, or all I'm capable of handling with respect to the cookie in question is uh--

THERAPIST

Is the frosting?

JACK

Exactly, exactly.

(pause)

And just because the frosting is my speciality doesn't mean that I can't do more. I have many layers to me. And they're not all vanilla, either. I have chocolate in me. I have a deep dark chocolate--

MAGGIE

I'm still hungry Daddy.

JACK

But, uh-- I'm sorry, Doc Martin and I are finishing--

MAGGIE

But what about the cookies?

JACK

Just a little while, okay? ----- It's uh, I'm uh, I'm sick of angry, resentful, uh------ fish, who uh think that you, that you owe them, but who won't trust you for a second to do anything for them.

THERAPIST

There are other fish in the sea, Jack.

JACK

Yes, I know. It's just I, I wish I could find a fish who wasn't afraid of my dark chocolate layer, and she'd have to love my cookie too. Y'know, I think that my ex-cookie maker has turned me off to fish entirely. I met a real piece of work this morning.

THERAPIST

Tell me about her Jack.

JACK

This fish was a fox. She had her own cookie too. What a female dog. She shoved her fish in my face.

THERAPIST

In front of the cookie? What's she doing with another fish anyway? She AC/DC?

JACK

What you talking about?

THERAPIST

Fish with other fish, in front of cookies.

JACK

Fish? Fish fish.

THERAPIST

Oh. I see.

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Anything Is Possible

It's just ideas. And cameras. And microphones.

Dream big. Begin small.

You're unique. Capture that in a bottle and release it into the world.

The world won't care at first, because artistry is a long game. It takes time to learn about ourselves, and our craft.

But we're better than we were three years ago. Better still than we were three months ago.

Watch films. Read books.

Stop watching films. Stop reading books, and create stuff.

Stop creating stuff and go have a romance, or a road trip. Go on a roller-coaster. Reconnect with your daughter.

Artists are the sum total of the magic alchemy of their unique lives. Dreaming mixed with insight mixed with expertise mixed with luck.

Rejection and failure are part of the game. The bitterness makes you fucked up. That's your edge, that's when you say "screw the rules" and reinvent the wheel.

Charlie Chaplin. Tupac Shakur. Ayrton Senna. Bill Hicks. Bruce Springsteen. All my heroes, in their respective fields, got screwed over by the system, by the gatekeepers. Yet they succeeded.

They're the masters. Lesser known artists thrive every day, all around the world.

It begins with an idea. An impulse. Years ago, 'Shawshank Redemption' didn't exist yet. And then Stephen King had to decide whether his idea was worthwhile or not.

J.K. Rowling was travelling on a train. A thought hit her. Something about wizards and quidditch. She decided to write it down and eventually I hear she did pretty well.

Anything is possible. Dream big, begin small.

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Den du frygter (Fear Me Not)

I love Danish films. Ulrich Thomsen is one of my favorite actors. He is able to play normal. Normal is really difficult to find in an actor, but he nails it. Having said that, his characters are always crazy! He got known after the film 'Festen', and I've been hooked on his work ever since.

What I love about Danish cinema is how real it is. How much it grips you. 'Fear Me Not' (Danish Title: Den Du Frygter) could never be made in America or the UK. I just don't think we have the capability. We see movies in a different way. The film is subtle and nuanced to a remarkable degree. The problem is, most directors try to be 'subtle'. It's an artistic choice. With Danish movies, it's just their way. The culture. The rhythm. 

'Fear Me Not' is an insane film to watch because, for a while, it's so relaxed and mundane that you're almost certain you're bored, but you don't realise you've been watching for fifty minutes already, just completely sinking into it. And then there's a twist. Not a Hollywood twist, not an oh-look-how-clever-we-are-twist, it's just a twist. Just like in real life, you think you know what a thing is and then it turns into the other thing. 

And that's why, if you're making a film in Denmark, you want Ulrich Thomsen in it, because we believe in him. And we relate to him. The problem with Hollywood is that when you relate to someone, they always have a moral reason for doing something. And if they don't, then rather than leave us dangling in uncertainty, we get reminded that they've lost their mental faculties. It's like with 'Taxi Driver', you relate to De Niro at first, and then he starts to go a bit mad and then you feel on edge. It'd be great to be left on this edge, but unfortunately he gets taken to bigger extremes and we learn to see him and judge him from afar. 

But not in 'Fear Me Not'. We see a character living the mundane life, in a marriage and home that's causing him frustration, and we relate to it. And then he does something despicable, disgusting, outrageous. And suddenly we're very tense, as we watch, because it wasn't expected at all. And we want to hate him, want to judge him, but we can't, because the edge is so perfectly balanced. 

And for the rest of the movie we're glued. We want to know what he'll do. When the next bomb will drop. And the bombs keep dropping. But they're not actual bombs like in a Hollywood movie, they're just the things he says and does to people. We cringe, but we keep watching. 

Towards the end, the twist comes. The twist is not even a twist so much as it's a fact we find out, and it changes our whole perception of Thomsen's character. It was the same in 'Festen' and the same in 'The Inheritance' (Danish Title: Arven); there were very real characters, going through very real problems, and then they deal with them slightly differently to what we expect, to what we're used to. But we're engrossed, because it's so believable. 

I don't know how they get the actors to be so good in these Danish movies. Paprika Steen is the female version of Thomsen (not surprising that they collaborate often). She's so truthful, so real. You're just mesmerised. All of the moments between the characters pull you in; you're there with them and you totally forget about your problems and your Tweets, you're in the movie. They're masters at what they do.

This film is fascinating. It's disturbing. It's tense. It's dramatic. You relate to some of it, and other parts you hope you don't relate to. Thomsen and Steen are so real and so natural that you totally buy into everything. They could suddenly discover aliens half way through, and you'd believe them. That's how good they are. 

A great film. Danish films are not for everyone, but give them a go. If you end up liking them, you'll rediscover your passion for films and storytelling all over again. 

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